Long and short of it

There has been more passings this past week. Including a young cousin. He was just 25. A short life indeed.

However, the cycle of life continues again with a new addition to a friend’s family.

- – -

Death. It’s the only certain thing in life. We just don’t know when. But I treat it like it is a long way ahead, waiting for me patiently. Maybe it won’t. And if so, I would likely to have regrets.

Because I’m unable to say that I care so much about YOU it hurts. A year may have passed but I still have that Tuesday evening in my mind when I know I should keep it buried inside and that no good will come out of re-living the past. I deserve to be happy, demmit.

And I couldn’t visit my friends all over the world every so often. I wish I could.

And I am afraid I won’t be able to ease my mother’s worries because I can’t seem to settle down anywhere.

- – -

Don’t settle for anything less. I’m trying hard not to.