siti and ahmad no more

Nor, confirm Mike dah tak ada…

It was over a month ago when Eddy and I were talking and somehow Mike’s name came up. She was our high school classmate who, a few years back, discovered that she had breast cancer. It was maybe another week after the conversation that I sent a message and received a prompt reply. Through the messages I found out how she had just given birth to a son and that her cancer had returned and had spread to one of her lungs.

June 11 was the last day I communicated with her, asking if she was still at the hospital. “Still warded! The tube that was poking my lung is out but white blood count is low so 4 more days,” was her last message to me.

I didn’t even get to speak to her, to hear her voice. Once, I wanted to call but she was in a chemo session. Another time I asked if I could visit, she told me to wait til she’s feeling better. Understandable, but I feel a tinge of regret.

The last time we actually spoke was years ago, when she was first diagnosed. It was a long conversation and I can still remember how she was determined to fight the cancer. Well, she did, and was able to move on to marry and have two children. It saddens me to think of them growing up without her around.

What a day to know about her passing, which occurred on Monday. Suzy called to confirm it, Eddy was first to alert me. But I had revisions to make on stories that will go to print very soon and trying to concentrate was difficult amidst the messages and calls.

What a news to start the weekend with, after a mid-week cyst scare, on top of deadlines.

A fighter to the finish, her last entry on her blog was dated May 3. I cried buckets when I read through her entries.

In one message, Mike said I should really write. I take it as another sign. It’s time to write stories.

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Siti Marlina Zainal 1976 – 2009
Al-Fatihah