better now

Dear X,

Glad things have cleared up. The phone call really did wonders to calm the storm that was in my head. However, I’m left with more questions now that the Cold War is over. Is it safe for me to come clean? Or will I be blown away by a landmine buried deep somewhere in your subconcious? I’m afraid to step forward. A terrifying thought it is, to actually care for someone. Old habits die hard. Despite my spontaneous streak, I am not a big risk taker. So I will just lay restless waiting for sleep to come, with thoughts of you in my mind. It’s a torture I welcome, seeing that the alternative is facing up to the facts. Maybe I’ll have the courage to do it, soon.


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