Category Archives: Musings

When you know you just don’t know

I got to spend a night onboard my favourite tall ship a couple of nights ago. Dapatla mengubat rindu.

After almost two years, I am feeling a little bit more comfortable doing this job. Experience helped, as well as the connections I have made. Still, there is a long way to go in this new journey. October 2020. That would be the finish line. For now.

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Under the light of a thousand stars

We were winding down at a cafe one evening when the topic of individuality came up, about not being swayed by our peers and being comfortable in our own skins.

I think it was the first time I said it out loud to others about it. About how sailing had a big impact in my life.

I was 14 when I learned to sail. A nerd sailor, I felt that I was cooler than the cool kids at school. Although I never had a problem with not being a cool kid, it was a nice feeling. It made me realised that I can be a different kind of cool and even if I was the only one, I am okay with it.

Ever since then, path has always been different from the ‘majority’ of my contemporaries. Japan was my country of choice for my undergraduate studies. Journalism when most of my friends ventured into the corporate world. A naval reservist.

Travel is another big influence in shaping who I am. The shoestring budget kind of travel, where each decision made is mostly based on cost and making the most of what I am able to afford. The kindness of strangers I have received, especially in 2010, made me rethink my priorities in life. It’s not about designer shoes or social status. It’s about passion and realising my dreams, it’s about giving back and living life to the fullest, despite the challenges that may come my way.

Make me better

Title of a song in James Blunt’s new album.  A very personal song and stripped down to the basics.  Pure music.

– – –

Watching Grimm and Sleepy Hollow reminded me again of why we should keep a record of the things happening around us.  They ALWAYS go back to books, journals, letters.  I write crappy stuff in my journals, but there are some useful reminders of significant events and milestones too.  Of happy moments, of heartbreaks and valuable lessons.  Maybe not much of the last part, though.

– – –

I am reading stories written by people I know this past week.  So different in style and genres but that is what makes it amazing.  Their personalities and characters are inside their books, sometimes in a word, an expression or even the names chosen to inhabit the world they created.  Local publishing houses, especially the new ones, should realise the importance of EDITING and PROOFREADING a product.  Typos can be a big turn off when you are caught up in the pages.

– – –

Yes, I should write.

Coming through in waves

I never thought of sailing for leisure, it has always been about racing.

Eddy said that yesterday and it occurred to me that I feel the same way. Even the few times I joined the pakciks to bring FORTISSIMO X out, all of us treated it as training, to try out a new equipment or simply to reconnect with the boat and make sure she is race worthy.

The one time I joined a couple of friends on a boat delivery job, it did feel like an assignment, with some elements of adventure and drama attached to it.

However, it would be nice to have a boat to just set out for a few hours to just enjoy the moment. Just like Jamie Cullum‘s song.

You arrived

Hana Maryam. She was born at 0137H Friday, 29 January.

Ida Yanti. Passed away after Maghrib Saturday, 30 January.

The latter had a relapse with cancer just a few months ago, it spread throughout her body starting from the lungs and had attacked her spine and brain cells. She was just 40.

About 10 days prior, an acquaintance in London passed due to a stroke, which happened after an operation. He was a few months shy of his 41st birthday.

Life is never a permanent thing to begin with, but I sometimes forget that fact, especially when I was younger. It’s easier to remember now, as I move closer to the fourth decade of my existence and have seen many of my elders, contemporaries and even people younger than me pass on.